And the Hares
And the Hares! (And the Hares!)
And the Hares! (And the Hares!)
And the Hares diggy diggy di do on down to their knees.
One…black one, one white one, and one with a little shite on,
and one with a little light on to show us the way.
And the Hares! (F*ck the Hares!)
And the Hares! (F*ck the Hares!)
And the Hares diggy diggy di do on down to their knees
Virgin Down Down
You put your cup in your hand.
You put the beer in the cup.
You put it to your lips,
and you lift the bottom up.
If you let it leave your mouth,
ya’ give your cranium a douse.
So, make sure you drink it,
down, down, down, down…
This is your Down Down Song (Ta Rah Rah)
This is your down down song
It isn’t very long
Drink it down, down, down, down…
Shitty Trail (Mickey Mouse)
S-H-I, T-T-Y, T-R-A-I-L,
Shitty trail, (It sucked!)
Shitty trail, (It blew!)
The hares have gone a laid a shitty trail.
I’d rather…(e.g. drink a bucket of warm f*cking vomit),
Than run your shitty trail,
S-H-I, T-T-Y, T-R-A-I-L.
Sweet Chariot
HASH MOUTH: “Ladies and gentlemen of the Hash, hats and vessels on the floor.”
Swing low, sweet chariot, (huh!)
Coming forth to carry me home,
Swing low, sweet chariot, (huh!)
Coming forth to carry me home.
I looked over Jordan (swish!) and what did I see,
Coming forth to carry me home,
A band of angels coming after me,
Coming forth to carry me home.
If you get there before I do, coming forth to carry me home,
Tell all my friends that I’m coming too,
Coming forth to carry me home.
Swing low, sweet chariot, (huh!)
Coming forth to carry me home,
Swing low, sweet chariot, (huh!)
Coming forth to carry me home.
May the Hash go in peace!
Why R We Waiting?
Why are we waiting,
Could be fornicating.
Oh, why are we waiting, so fucking long, etc…
Why are we waiting,
Could be masturbating.
Oh, why are we waiting, so fucking long, etc…
Get a Life
Get a life, get a life, get a life life life.
Get a life, get a life, get a life life life.
Get a life, get a life, get a life life life.
Get a life…get a life life life life.
Drink it down, down, down, down….
Hashy Anniversary/Birthday (Happy Birthday)
Hashy anniversary/birthday f*ck you,
Hashy anniversary/birthday f*ck you,
Hashy anniversary/birthday you a$$hole,
Hashy anniversary/birthday f*ck you.
Drink it down, down, down, down…
Speed Racer
Go speed racer, go speed racer
go speed racer go’o’o!
Hymn, Hymn
Hymn, Hymn,
Fuck him!
She Likes it in the Kitchen
She likes it in the kitchen,
She likes it in the kitchen,
She likes it in the kitchen,
And kitchen is her a$$!
Soldier’s Song
Ass-hole, ass-hole, a soldier I will be.
To piss, to piss, two pistols on my knee.
For cunt, for cunt, for country and for king,
Asshole, asshole, asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be.
Drink it down, down, down, down…
We’ve got Virgins (Frere Jacques)
We’ve got virgins, We’ve got virgins,
At our hash, At our hash,
Gonna get ’em drunked up, Gonna get ’em fucked up,
Down the hatch, up the a$$.
Donny the Retard (Frosty the Snowman)
Donnie the retard, Had an eight pound melon head.
He was five foot three and he said to me,
Hiii myyy naaame isss Donnnnnie!
Give it a Blow (Let it Snow)
Oh the weather outside is frightful,
But my cock is so delightful.
So if you want to see it grow,
Give it a blow, give it a blow, give it a blow!
I Want a Gang Bang
I wanna gang bang if I could, because a gang bang feels so good.
When I was younger and in my prime, I used to gang bang all the time.
But now I’m older and getting gray, I only gang bang once a day.
So I just have to say, let’s gang bang anyway!
He’s the Meanest
He’s the meanest, he sucks the horse’s penis.
He’s the meanest, he’s a horse’s ass.
Every since he found it, all he does is pound it.
He’s the meanest, he’s a horse’s ass.
He’s always pissing on us, He’s rotten and dishonest,
He’s the meanest, He’s a horse’s ass.
So drink it down, down, down, down…
Dough Ray Me (Do Ra Mi)
Dough, the stuff, that buys me beer,
Ray, the guy who serves me beer,
Me, the guy, who drinks the beer,
Far, a long way to the john,
So, I’ll have another beer,
La, I’ll have another beer,
Tea, no thanks I’ll have a beer,
And that brings us back to, Dough . . . (etc)
Ball Game (Take me out to the ball game)
Whip it out at the ball game,
Wave it round at the crowd,
Dip it in Jello and Crackerjacks,
I don’t care if you give it a whack,
Because it’s beat your meat at the ball game,
If you don’t come it’s a shame,
For it’s one, two, and you’re covered in goo, at the old ball game!
I Wish I Was in Dixie (Dixie)
I wish I was in Dixie,
Hurrah, hurrah.
I wish I was in Dixie,
Cause she’s f*cking hot!
It’s a Small Dick (It’s a Small World)
Well it isn’t long and it isn’t think,
It gets hard too slow and it cums too quick,
It gets lost in her twat but it’s all that he’s got,
It’s a small, small dick.
It’s a small dick after all,
It’s a small dick after all,
Always limp from alcohol,
It’s a small, small dick!
Publicly Pissed Upon (Bonnie Lies over the Ocean)
He ought to publicly pissed upon,
He ought to be publicly shot (Bang! Bang!),
He out to be tied to a urinal,
And left there to fester and rot (I love that part!)
Her Left Tit (Bonnie Lies over the Ocean)
Her left tit hangs down to her belly,
Her right tit hangs down to her knee.
If her left tit did equal her right tit,
She’d get lots of weenie from me.
Drink it down, down, down, down…
Foreskin Song (Bonnie Lies over the Ocean)
My one skin hangs down to my two skin,
My two skin hangs down to my three,
My three skin hangs down to my foreskin,
My foreskin hangs down to my knees.
Roll back, roll back, Roll back my foreskin for me, for me.
Roll back, roll back, Please roll back my foreskin for me.
Drink it down, down, down, down…
Skeeter on my Peter (happy and you know it)
There’s a skeeter on my peter, wack it off,
There’s a skeeter on my peter, wack it off,
There’s a dozen on my cousin’s,
I can here the f*cker’s buzzin,
There’s a skeeter on my peter, wack it off!
Girlfriend Tastes Like Sh*t (happy and you know it)
If your girlfriend tastes like shit, roll her over.
If your girlfriend tastes like shit, roll her over.
If your girlfriend tastes like shit,
It’s her asshole not her clit.
If your girlfriend tastes like shit, roll her over!
Where Oh Where? (Hee Haw)
Where, oh where, were you last week?
Why did you make us Hash all alone?
You fat lazy bastards, You weren’t even here.
So we fucked all the virgins, And drank all the beer!
Drink it down, down, down, down, down…
Hash House Harriers (Addams Family)
Their drinking is compulsive,
Their running is convulsive,
They’re morally repulsive,
The Hash House Harriers!
[Chorus]
Da da da da (snap fingers twice)
Da da da da (snap fingers twice)
Da da da da, da da da da, da da da da
Their flatulance is rude and,
Their genitals protrude when,
They’re running in the nude in,
The Hash House Harriers! [Chorus]
They’re always shiggy-tracking
From constantly bushwhacking.
Intelligence they’re lacking.
The Hash House Harriers! [Chorus]
Drink it down, down, down, down…
Days of the Week
Today is Monday, (Today is Monday)
Monday is a wanking day. (Monday is a wanking day)
CHORUS:
Is ev’rybody happy? (You bet your ass we are!)
Da da dut da da, da da dut da da
Today is Tuesday,
Tuesday is two finger day.
Monday is a wanking day. [Chorus]
Today is Wednesday, Wednesday is an eatin’ day,
Tuesday is two finger day.
Monday is a wanking day. [Chorus]
Today is Thursday,
Thursday is a drinking day,
Wednesday is an eatin’ day,
Tuesday is two finger day.
Monday is a wanking day. [Chorus]
Today is Friday,
Friday is a hashing day,
Thursday is a drinking day,
Wednesday is an eatin’ day,
Tuesday is two finger day.
Monday is a wanking day. [Chorus]
Today is Saturday,
Saturday is a f*cking day,
Friday is a hashing day,
Thursday is a drinking day,
Wednesday is an eatin’ day,
Tuesday is two finger day.
Monday is a wanking day. [Chorus]
Today is Sunday,
Sunday is a day or rest.
Saturday is a f*cking day,
Friday is a hashing day,
Thursday is a drinking day,
Wednesday is an eatin’ day,
Tuesday is two finger day.
Monday is a wanking day. [Chorus]
Balls to your Partner (The Ball of Kerrymuir)
CHORUS:
Balls to your partner, a$$ against the wall.
If you’ve never been laid on Saturday night,
You’ve never been laid at all!
FIRST VERSE:
First lady forward,
second lady back.
Third lady’s finger up
the fourth lady’s crack. (chorus)
FINAL VERSE:
And when the ball was over,
Everyone confessed,
They all enjoyed the dancing,
But the fucking was the best! (chorus)
- Four and twenty virgins, came down from Inverness,
And when the ball was over, there were four and twenty less. - There was fucking in the hallways, and fucking in the ricks,
You couldn’t hear the music, for the swishing of the pricks. - There was fucking in the kitchen, and fucking in the halls,
You couldn’t hear the music for the clanging of the balls. - They were fucking in the Barley, and fucking in the oats.
Some were fucking sheep, but most were fucking goats. - There was fucking in the parlor, and fucking on the stairs,
You couldn’t see the carpet, for the mass of pubic hairs. - The parson’s daughter she was there, the cunning little runt,
With poison ivy up her ass, and ‘Miso’ in her cunt. - The village idiot he was there, sitting on a pole
Pulled his foreskin over his head, and whistled though the hole. - Little Tommy he was there, he was only eight
Couldn’t fuck the women, so he had to masturbate. - The blacksmith’s brother he was there, mighty stud was he
Lined ’em up against the wall, nd fucked ’em three-by-three. - The village cripple he was there, he couldn’t move too much,
So he lined the ladies against the wall, And fucked them with his crutch! - The village policeman he was there, The pride of the force,
They found him in the stables, Jacking off the horse! - Little Jimmy he was there, The leader of the choir,
He hit the balls of all the boys, To make their voices go higher! - The bride she was there, Explaining to the groom,
That the gina’ – not the asshole, Is the entrance to the womb!
Rawhide (Rawhide)
Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’, My dick is getting’ swollen,
I got this doggie rollin’, Rawhide.
My knob is hard as leather, But I’ll get it in whatever,
I wish I could get the tip inside,
I stab but I keep missin’, This wasn’t made for pissin’,
I’m waiting for this year’s first ride.
Pull ‘em down, get ‘em off, Get ‘em off,
pull ‘em down, Pull ‘em down, Get ‘em off, Rawhide.
Stick it in, pull it out, Pull it out, stick it in,
Stick it in, pull it out, Rawhide.
She’s movin’, movin’, movin’, Stops my manhood groovin’,
This doggie won’t stop movin’, Rawhide.
It’s gonna be sore later, But I’ve been a masturbator,
All those years that I’ve just spent inside,
My balls, they are aching, From years of wanking and waiting,
Waiting to get this thing inside.
Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’, I’m rootin’ her assholin’,
We’re mounted doggy style, Rawhide.
I don’t try to understand her, Just catch and grope and bang her,
Now her twat is getting’ wet and wide,
My foreskin’s torn and tattered, Her pussy’s worn and battered,
At last I’ll drop my load inside. Rawwwww…. hide!
Yogi Bear (Camptown Races)
There is a bear in the deep dark woods, Yogi, Yogi,
There is a bear in the deep dark woods, Yogi, Yogi Bear.
[Chorus]
Yogi, Yogi Bear, Yogi, Yogi Bear,
There is a bear in the deep dark woods, Yogi, Yogi Bear.
[Other Verses]
Yogi has a little friend, Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo Bear…
Boo-Boo has a girlfriend, Cyndi, Cyndi Bear…
Yogi has a girlfriend, Suzi, Suzi Bear…
Cyndi has a shaven snatch, Grizzly, Grizzly Bear…
Cyndi wears crotchless undies, Teddy, Teddy Bear…
Cyndi likes it on the ice, Polar, Polar Bear…
Cyndi isn’t on the pill, Pregnant, Pregnant Bear…
Suzi likes it up the rear, Dirty, Dirty Bear…
Suzi’s boyfriend has no teeth, Gummi, Gummi Bear…
Suzi’s snatch it smells like cheese, Camel, Camel Bear…
Suzi she has great big tits, More than, More than (I can bear)
Suzi gets four bits an hour, Jingle, Jingle…
Cyndi’s tampon has no string, Cotton, Cotton…
Yogi didn’t use a condom, Daddy, Daddy…
Boo-Boo likes it upside down, Koala, Koala….
Boo-Boo has a twelve-inch cock, Cindy’s a lucky bear…
Boo-Boo’s only three feet tall, Midget, Midget…
Boo-Boo likes it up the butt, Yogi’s a lucky bear…
Yogi didn’t wipe his butt, Brown, Brown…
Yogi uses Afro-Sheen, Black, Black…
Yogi hashed at Ginnie Springs , Miso Itchy…
Yogi lights Kuwaiti farts, Saddam, Saddam…
Boo-Boo likes to stroke his tool, Wanker, Wanker…
Yogi also likes young boys, Poofter, Poofter…
Song ender: Yogi he has HIV, Dying, Dying . . .
Humper. BEER SOUP FOR THE HASHER’S SOLES: The Hash House Harrier Guidebook (Kindle Locations 1573-2169). S&B Publishing. Kindle Edition.